Monday, March 28, 2011

Project 31: Day 6?. Most Embarrassing Moment

The Tale of the Disastrous First Date.
Sarah (sassy and fabulous main character)
Amy (Sarah's skinnier BFF)
David (Amy's bf and James' BFF)
James (Sarah's love target)
     Once upon a time in high school, there was a chipper, boy-crazy blond named Sarah.  Among many admirable qualities, Sarah didn't have the greatest self-confidence, and to put it politely, was never considered to be "the skinny one" among her friends.  But she still had a blasty blast, and was up to the usual no-goodedness of high school.
     This particular month, Sarah had a gigantic teeny little crush on a boy named *James. (names have been changed to protect the innocent.)  James was a couple of years older, had a great personality, had his license and his own car (swoon!), and a smile that would melt your heart. 
   One fateful, blazing July afternoon, James invited Sarah, Amy, and David over to his house...with the instruction to 'bring a swimsuit.'  Sarah secretly dreaded hearing those words, but couldn't resist an afternoon with her handsome love.  Sarah and Amy primped and prepped for their hot double date, and off they went. 
     Turns out James' parents had a hot tub on their back porch, and James wanted to hang out there.  In the middle of July.  Sarah was not about to argue with that sweet face, so she hid behind her towel until the last possible second, waited for James to get distracted and turn his head, and dove into the hot tub like she was an alumni member of the US Olympic Diving Team.  Anything to be hidden away and under the water.     
     They chatted.  They flirted.  They laughed and tossed their hair.  Everyone else got out to get something to drink or use the restroom; Sarah was too shy and embarrassed in her swimsuit to get out.
     So she stayed in the hot tub.
     In the middle of July.
((A small side note.  For those of you who haven't quite thought this through yet, a person doesn't know that they're sweating if they're in a hot tub.  But they are.  And if you stay in too long, don't drink anything because you don't want to get out to potty, and sweat for four hours in the middle of summer?  Dehydration is uncool.  You see where my story is going.))
   When they were all pruny, the foursome hopped out of the hot tub onto the pebble patio.  Sarah furiously wrapped herself like a burrito in her beach towel, and they headed inside to change. 
     Sarah realized something wasn't quite right.  She looked at Amy, casually declared "I'm about to pass out," and hit the pavement.  She fell backwards into what should have been James' arms, but James was so caught off guard he didn't catch her and let her head hit the lovely pebble patio. (It hit so hard that I Sarah remembers it even though she was unconscious.) When she came to, Amy was screaming, "she needs food!" and shoving a banana into Sarah's mouth.  Sarah did not enjoy bananas at the time, and the mushy consistency made her gag repeatedly and nearly throw up.  And then she looked down and realized her towel was gone.  Bathing suit exposed. 
Embarrassing moment doesn't even begin to describe it all.
Needless to say, that was our last date.

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